The holiday season is often seen as a time of celebration, joy, and togetherness. But for many, it can also bring up feelings of loneliness, grief, or even a sense of being disconnected from the festivities around them. If you’re feeling this way, know that you’re not alone—and it’s okay to feel differently from what’s often shared. In this blog, we’re exploring ways to address these challenging emotions with compassion, honoring your feelings, and creating a sense of connection and peace during this time of year.
1. Acknowledge Your Feelings of Loneliness and Grief
It's normal to feel a wide range of emotions during the holiday season, particularly if you’re grieving or feeling isolated. Rather than pushing yourself to feel “merry,” acknowledge your feelings and give yourself permission to feel them. You might experience sadness, anger, or even longing as you remember loved ones or reflect on the changes in your life. The Healing Hearts Journal offers prompts that gently guide children in grades 3-8, through these complex emotions, encouraging reflection without pressure to be “happy” just because it’s the holidays.
Self-Care Activity: Try a "feelings inventory." Set aside a few quiet minutes to journal honestly about how you’re feeling. Whether it’s sadness, anger, or a mix of emotions, writing them down can help release some of the heaviness.
2. Remembering Loved Ones in Meaningful Ways
Honoring the memory of a loved one during the holidays can bring a sense of closeness and warmth. Simple, heartfelt gestures like lighting a candle, making their favorite dish, or creating a small memorial can help you feel connected. Sharing stories or looking through old photos with others can also be comforting, reminding you of cherished memories and keeping their spirit alive during the season. Sharing fun stories creating laughter and happy moments can be uplifting and memorable.
Self-Care Activity: Consider writing a letter to your loved one or make a video to look back on later. Expressing your feelings, sharing holiday updates, or even talking about how much you miss them can be incredibly healing. You can tuck the letter away in your journal or place it somewhere meaningful.
3. Seek Support and Connection
While the holiday season may amplify feelings of loneliness, reaching out to those who understand can make a difference. Whether it's family members, friends, or even a support group—virtual or in-person—finding others to talk to can ease some of the isolation. Online communities are also a wonderful resource where people experiencing similar emotions gather to offer support and companionship, especially if in-person connections feel overwhelming.
Self-Care Activity: Make a plan to call, text, or meet up (virtually or in person) with one or two trusted friends or family members. Schedule a coffee date, a casual video call, or even a walk. Having a gentle, no-pressure connection to look forward to can provide comfort and remind you that support is available.
4. Engage in Self-Care with the Healing Hearts Journal
Taking time for self-care is crucial, especially during times of grief or loneliness. The Healing Trauma Affirmation Journal for Teens and Tweens and The Healing Trauma Affirmation Journal for Adults are helpful tools for processing emotions, offering guided prompts and activities that gently encourage self-reflection. Try using one of the journals to explore what brings you comfort and allows you to find a bit of peace.
Self-Care Activity: Use a journal prompt like, “What is one small thing that brings me comfort?” or “What would my ideal holiday look like?” These can help you focus on small steps to create a holiday experience that feels manageable and supportive.
5. Take Things One Day at a Time
Remember, there’s no “right” way to feel or experience the holiday season. Be gentle with yourself, and take things one day at a time. Each day may bring different emotions, and it’s okay to let yourself move at your own pace. The holidays can feel overwhelming, but breaking it down into smaller, daily moments can make it more manageable. Consider starting each day with a grounding activity, like a short meditation, positive affirmation, or a cup of tea, to set a peaceful tone.
Self-Care Activity: Each morning, take a moment to set an intention for the day. This could be as simple as “Today, I’ll take time to breathe,” or “Today, I’ll reach out to someone who makes me feel safe.” Simple intentions can provide a bit of focus and calm.
6. Explore Gratitude, But Only When It Feels Right
Gratitude can be a gentle tool for shifting perspectives, but only if it feels genuine. If you feel ready, try focusing on a few things you’re thankful for—even if they seem small. Practicing gratitude isn’t about ignoring your pain; instead, it’s about finding small points of light even in difficult times. For adults, the Healing Affirmation Journal for Adults offers prompts that encourage a compassionate mindset, helping you reconnect with things that bring a sense of calm.
Self-Care Activity: Write down one thing you feel grateful for each day, however small. You might be thankful for a warm cup of coffee, a pet’s companionship, or even the comfort of a cozy blanket. Let these small gratitude bring a gentle lift to your day.
Final Thoughts
If this holiday season doesn’t feel “merry” to you, give yourself permission to experience it in your own way. Allow yourself to feel whatever arises, remembering that there’s no right or wrong way to feel. Take small steps to honor your needs, connect with loved ones or community members, and lean on tools like the Healing Hearts Journal to guide you. Sometimes, peace comes in small, meaningful moments, and even these can be enough to bring a sense of comfort and hope.
Helpful Resources for the Journey:
Exploring My Emotions Journal for Elementary School-Age Children: Great for young ones to express feelings in a gentle way.
Healing Hearts Journal: For processing grief and exploring self-compassion.
Healing Affirmation Journal for Teens and Tweens: Includes affirmations to help younger individuals build self-kindness.
Healing Affirmation Journal for Adults: Encourages a reflective, calming mindset during difficult times.
This holiday season, may you find moments of comfort, however they come. You’re not alone, and we’re here to support you along the way.
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Stay mindful and take care,
Tamera Foley, Ph.D.
Mending Minds and Healing Hearts
Education 4 All Now LLC
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